You Can Ring My Bell, Anytime Anywhere...

If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it, right? Well, who do you like more than you? Before you answer that with a lie, please check out this ring I found. It's huge and looks antique and is more than a bit ugly - how could I have stopped myself from falling in love? 
I couldn't and hopefully you can't either. This ring is pure drama and I love it. It reminds me of something Alexis Carrington Colby would have worn with a robe while she drank champagne and spurned a lover/found a long-lost twin/cut a bitch.
I found this on jcrew.com under the sale section, of course. it comes in two colors but I like the hematite-plated version better. Under $30, easy to find and won't turn your finger green - what else do you want from me? 

Antique Violet Majesty stone cocktail ring, $29.99, jcrew.com 


Lots of garish love, 
-kasey

you can't take it (all) with you

An aside - Can there be anything more satisfying than listening to Daft Punk's "Something About Us" at 11pm when the lights are low? Get back to me on that one after you've tried it. Right now I feel like I'm typing in space (which is a good thing).


Reeling it back in, tonight we'll discuss that fine line between thrifty and cheap.  We all know someone who's thrifty, i.e., makes conscious, informed decisions about where their money goes. We also all know someone who's just plain old cheap. Always complaining about money, never wants to go out/buy anything because God Forbid, they part with some cash. 


Side Note - everyone thinks they're thrifty. It's a rare breed who can admit their cheapness. I have one friend (whose name I shall not mention as I've haven't asked her) who will happily tell you how cheap she is. I appreciate her candor. You know where you stand with Ms. X, and you also know what  activities you can and cannot do with her.  Dinner at home? Absolutely. Dinner and a movie? Depends, does she have a gift card?  Well, as Grandma always said, ain't no future in frontin' so today I will outline the subtle and not-so-subtle differences between the two.  Not sure where you stand? You're probably cheap, but keep reading just in case - you never know.


Thrifty: 
You use coupons. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking advantage of an offer to save money on something you already planned on buying. 
Cheap:
Your lifestyle and purchases are driven by coupons, special offers, etc.  Doesn't matter if it's your anniversary or someone's birthday - if it doesn't cost you next to nothing, you're not going there or purchasing it. 


Thrifty:
You go to the local beauty college to save money on haircuts.
Cheap: You cut not only your own hair, but you just may subject other family members to the same mistreatment. [Editor's note - shame on you if you subject anyone other than yourself to this. There's a special place in hair hell for those who butcher the hair of others in the name of saving a buck.]


Thrifty:
You split an entree with someone else at dinner, or have half wrapped up for your lunch the next day.
Cheap: You order an appetizer/bowl of soup with the claim of not being hungry, then pick off everyone's plates once the food comes. I can't tell you how much I despise this behavior.


Thrifty:
You buy in bulk or when certain items are on sale to give as gifts later in the year. Examples: greeting cards, stocking stuffers,  or an item someone has mentioned in the past that just happens to be on sale now.  This makes sense. You're leveraging today's opportunity to save money in the future.
Cheap:
You have a PhD in re-gifting. You look at Christmas and birthday gifts as an opportunity to not have to spend money on people's gifts in the future. Everyone regifts from time to time, but you pride yourself on rolling gifts so much you don't end up spending anything. Presents are one big shell game to you, and you really don't care if someone likes their gift, as you take no pleasure in it anyway.  This is another behavior I cannot stand. Enjoy your damn presents, would you? I promise it won't hurt too much.


I could go on ad nauseam, but I have a really great piece to show you so I'm going to cut myself off.  Hopefully you are a thrifty, kind and generous person. I know you are. 


Lots of Optimistic Love, 
Kase

I'm Up for It

Sometimes a woman's got to challenge herself. One of my new favorite sites has some great clothing, but it tends to be a bit on the pricey side. It also has an awesome feature called "Be the Buyer" where you can VOTE ON WHAT THEY WILL SELL NEXT. I'm completely obsessed with it and also horrified by what the general public considers "cute".  More on that some other time. 


Anyway, the ones that DON'T get picked by the general public are generally great aside from the fact that they tend to be a bit expensive. (Have I told you I think they are too expensive?) Therefore, I went on a rampage to find something that would fit my criteria. After much rummaging, rejecting and swearing, I finally ran into the groovy little frock you see before you. 


Color choice - great. Love the 70's look and the horizontal stripes are thin enough to flatter a multitude of figures.  Cut - great, but I wouldn't recommend it for the long-legged or taller ladies, as modcloth tends to run short. Also, the puckered waist effect you are seeing is due to putting a larger dress on a smaller model and tying the strings tight. If you want that,purchase a size larger than you normally wear. This cut is also great for petite women who need to carve out a waist or hourglass-shaped women with a naturally smaller waist. 


Wear it - with a long sleeved shirt and tights, over jeans if you roll like that (I don't), or on its own on a hot summer day with wedge sandals and nothing else. Of course, you can wear it like a beach coverup/romper as the poorly written (sorry)  product copy suggests, but we're a little more creative than that, yes?


Seaside Park Dress, $24.99, modcloth.com - Available in M, L in the "under $50" section. 


Hearts, Stars, Moons and Clovers, 


kasey

Know when to fold 'em - On vs. Off-brand

You may not love the song ("The Gambler" - Kenny Rogers) but there's a nugget of good advice in there. He's basically telling a newbie that he needs to discern what's important from what isn't, concentrate on that, and leverage it as much as he can. Well, I can easily say the same for money. Ya gotta know when to spend it and know when it's not worth it. 

Which brings me to today's nugget - when/where do we spend the money and where do we skimp? Some people are slave to brands when they could be saving tons of cash while others are buying store-brand mac & cheese and hating life when coughing up the extra dollar would have been worth it.  

After pondering, polling some coworkers and others, I've compiled a somewhat comprehensive list of On-Brand/Off-Brand items (with justifications). You may agree, you may not, but I'm just trying to help you hit that financial sweet spot. Onward...

ON-BRAND 

1. Food - This is the fuel you're putting into your most prized possession - YOU. I am not by any means stating that you need to go out and buy Velveeta Shells & Cheese, but buying Organic and Local fruit, vegetables and meat products can make a HUGE difference in how you feel - which impacts your decisions, which impacts your money, which impacts your life. This is definitely more expensive, and you may need to take the less-is-more approach - shop more often in smaller increments, wasting nothing. This takes effort, but it's worth it. You can afford to treat your body well. 

2. Hair Products - This is my personal thing. Everybody has one, so you can insert your ONE vanity/vice here if you'd like, as long as it's not scratch-offs, cocaine or other expensive things that leave you with nothing to show for them.  Using good shampoo and conditioner actually shows. Believe me, I have tried to get around this so many ways and it just doesn't work. Hair is essentially dead cells - so if you put low-grade chemicals on them, it's going to reflect that. If you put high-quality proteins and extracts on them, it's going to reflect that.  This is especially important for those of us with color-treated hair. Don't spend money to color your hair only to put shitty chemicals on it every day. [Editor's note - if you don't wash your hair every day and only condition your ends, good product will last you a long time.}  If you have virgin hair (i.e., never been permed/straightened/colored), you MAY be able to get away with a mid-level product but make sure you trim frequently.

3. Shoes - READ THIS THROUGH BEFORE YOU GO BUY THOSE LABOUTINS.  Okay - I learned the hard way that your feet are really, really important. After 12 hours of waiting tables one weekend, I realized how vital a well-constructed, comfortable shoe really is. I don't mean impractical, hurt your feet expensive shoes - I mean a nice pair of fairly expensive, durable, versatile shoes that you can wear for years and re-heel if needed. You may not have a ton of shoes, but the ones you have won't hurt, make your feet stink, or need to be replaced every two months because the fake leather ripped/plastic heel broke. 

4. Sporting Equipment -  This only applies if you are fairly avid. If you're not going to take your bike out/go running/play a sport/etc. more than once a year or you tend to go from fad to fad, skip this one and keep reading. If you're still here - if you're dedicated to a certain sport, having quality equipment is pretty essential. Please don't ever skimp when it comes to safety or quality, especially in protective gear.  Well-made equipment and clothing is going to be the most comfortable, durable and reliable. You don't want to be in yoga class when your cheapo shorts split at the seams or on the slopes with your fingers going numb because you decided to knit your own gloves. You'll end up spending more money on going through a bunch of cheap shit and paying doctor bills than you ever would on that good-quality helmet.

5. Facial products - Your face shows. Investing in some good facial cream is going to pay off in the long run. Not using good facial products is penny wise and pound foolish. I'm not saying you need La Mer, but getting a decent facial lotion is worth the extra expense. Men, this can apply to you as well, especially with shaving products (razors in particular).  

Now for the cheapskate's fun part.....

OFF-BRAND 

1. OTC medicines, band-aids, etc. - Tyle-what?? Hell no. When it comes to ibuprofen, acetaminophen (Tylenol), cough syrups, sinus medications, band-aids, baby oil, contact solution, tampons, or any other OTC thing available at the drugstore, off-brand is where it's at.  Medicines are medicines - compare doses and ingredients and you'll see that there is essentially no difference. You may not be able to have "rapid release", but the off-brand ibuprofen is going to do the exact same job as Advil. Same goes for tampons and contact solutions - it's all the same stuff. Unless you go way organic with your tampons (which I respect), just get the pharmacy brand. These are essentially items with the exact same makeup, just a brand name/packaging separating them, and you paying an extra $1-2. Save that for your organic food or nice shoes. 


2. Cereal - This has come a LONG way. Back in the day, I would have never advocated this, but now every store brand seems to have a duplicate of your favorite cereal, even the healthy ones! Stunning. Anyway, give the store brand a shot. You may be very surprised. Even the bag cereal has stepped up its game. I'd advocate getting the healthier cereals, but that's your decision. 

3. Nail Polish - Ladies and Trannies, Wet & Wild works. All polish chips. You may as well spend $1 on your polish instead of $3 if we all know what's going to happen. This is especially true if you are purchasing clear polish. Anything but W&W in that situation is just dumb. 


4. Hair Color -  This is only for the adventurous and those who are willing to experiment a bit.  There are a few box color brands (cough, Feria, cough) that can get the job done without spending a ton of cash.  That being said, you need to be willing to color your hair all one shade, and not be looking for something really drastic. Follow all of the instructions to the T - this is NOT a time for freelancing. Do not attempt this if you're looking for highlights. Do not attempt this if your hair is in bad shape. Do attempt this if your hair is in fairly good condition and you want a bit of a change. It's never going to come out as light as the box shows, but it can make an impact. DO NOT DO THIS IF YOU'RE GOING RED. Unless you are purposely going for a Magenta look, leave Red to a pro. It's a really tricky color to achieve, let alone have it look semi-natural. 


5. TP/PT -  This one seems to divide people, but more often than not I hear people say they skimp on toilet paper and paper towels. Makes sense as you're only going to be using them once.  Personally, I don't use paper towels and it saves me a lot of money. You'd be surprised how accustomed you can get to wiping up spills with a cloth. As far as TP, as long as it's not one-ply, I will roll with whatever comes down the pike. I know some people can be very particular about this subject, so I shall leave you to your own decisions on this delicate matter. 


6. Soap/Body Wash - This is another case of it all being pretty much the same thing. Unless you have very sensitive/delicate skin, go for the Suave body wash and the fake dove beauty bars. PS - soap is 10x cheaper than body wash and it's really convenient. 


So, no one can have it all, right? Well, there is a place I like to call the BRAND LOOPHOLE, or TJ MAXX (and the like)!  Go there on the right day and you can find on-brand items for off-brand prices. This is especially true for housewares, bedding, towels, and beauty products. Just make sure to look everything over to make sure it hasn't been handled too much, and wash prior to using. This takes a little time and patience, but you can find some serious deals. 


Before I go - things that are a tiny bit off-topic but deserve mention - doing your own eyebrow waxes (be careful), bartering for services, clothing swaps with friends, going to the library and packing your lunch can all help you save some cash.


Well, there you have it. My list of off/on brands to maximize your money. I hope you've found this helpful and if you have any more, please don't hesitate to comment.  Next post will be clothing and covetable, per usual. 


Lots of bank-breaking love, 


Kasey

You're the picture on my wall, you're a vision in the hall

If I were a set director, this would have been in Belle & Sebastian's "Funny Little Frog" video. Try listening to this song and not thinking about this shower curtain or vice-versa. I dare you.

As I've said before, shower curtains mean a lot to me. I'm going to be honest - I judge your style on your choice of shower curtain. It's not logical or fair, but it's what I do. Color me human.

I see it as such an opportunity to showcase your personal style - a huge blank canvas that you can do anything you want with. You don't even have to know how to draw! {Editor's note: that's important for people like me who can only draw two things, one being an eye and the other being a snoopy out of the number 25.}

Let's say you have a stark-white, standard apartment bathroom. I'm with you on that. You may or may not be able to paint it, and you have to be careful there, considering the size of the bathroom as it's really easy to overwhelm a typically small space with color, giving it that pleasant feel of claustrophobia or panic. Let's say you can't paint it but you really want some color in there, or something that makes you smile, your personal stamp on what is otherwise a very fixed environment.

May I present - the Singing in the Rain shower curtain from Target. Graphically, it's right on the mark, very striking while avoiding an overwhelming pattern. And who can resist the pull of the romantic, optimistic theme? I will admit that this may skew a bit female, but I think a man could pull this off, especially with a darker/duller color curtain liner. Grey would be quite cheeky.

Well, it's actually not raining and I do feel like singing a bit, so I'm out of here. You can find this on target.com, but you must go to the Red Hot Shop on the homepage, and scroll about halfway down. I trust you to be able to navigate a website.

Singing in the Rain Shower Curtain, $19.99, target.com

Lots and lots of Gene Kelly-esque love, K

Sealed with a Kiss

This post isn't for the faint of heart or those who are running low on discipline. This post is for those who have straight-up fucked themselves. Financially, of course. What you do on your own time isn't my business. Unless you want to tell me.

Anyway - let's say you've been less than careful with your finances as of late. Since we believe our own lies the most, I'll lay out some signs that indicate you need to get not just a grip, but a choke-hold on your money situation:

1. You run out of money for essentials before your next pay period. By this, I mean you can't fill your gas tank, are getting anything you can for free, and are avoiding things like parking meters, as you need that change for the candy bar you're going to buy for dinner.

2. You're using credit cards to fill in the gaps (usually as a result of #1).
This means you don't have any cash for the essentials, but you're putting them on plastic. You might even be going beyond that and adding in some dinners out or clothes here and there.
HUGE.FUCKING.MISTAKE.
If you're doing this - stop. stop now, and I mean this minute, young lady/man. Cut the card up or get someone else to cut it up for you if you have to. This is not a solution, this is the financial equivalent of putting a band-aid on a hemorrhaging head wound. It might work for this instant, but the long-term damage is severe.

3. You're borrowing money from family/friends/others with no real intentions or plans to pay it back. Come on now! Your irresponsibility is now spilling into other people's lives. It's messy, embarrassing, selfish and shows poor character. If you are truly in trouble, i.e., you need to make bail or have emergency surgery - that is an exception. Most things are not, that's why those instances are called EXCEPTIONS. Anything from #1 or #2 does not fall into this. Handle your business.

4. Any of the above is happening without a loss of a job, serious illness or some other severe life circumstance. Things happen in life that are way beyond our control, and sometimes we need some extra help. If you are in this boat, speak with a financial professional who may be able to assist you. If you are NOT in this boat, keep reading before your credit score plunges any further.

Now that I've laid out the criteria, I'll also tell you that I've never had to make bail, but I've been BROKE in my lifetime, and I've done all 3 of these things listed above. I'm not proud of my financial past, but I took a long, hard look and did something about it. I have three rules - a.) I pay cash for it, or I can't afford it, unless it's a car or a house.
b.) If the choice is to pay the bill now or wait until the next paycheck, I pay it NOW before I can decide otherwise.
c.) If I slip into any of the behaviors listed above, I go to the envelope method.

The envelope method has saved me. A lot of my bad financial decisions actually came from worrying and making impulse purchases. Basically, I felt like I wasn't going to have enough so I spent too much, therefore creating that situation for myself. The envelope method will make sure you have enough. You may not have a lot, but you will have enough. Sometimes these two things are farther apart than we'd like them to be. Suck it up. If you do this long enough, it will change.

This is very simple - you get paid. You pay all of your current bills. If you cannot pay all of the bills without having NOTHING, and I mean NOTHING, hold at least $50 - $75 back, take the bill that is due the furthest out, and call your creditor to explain that you will be late. Pay that bill first with your next check,

Let's assume you're starting clean, and get paid every 2 weeks. You can pay the impending bills, and have a little left over. Not a lot, but some. Probably just enough to feel like you're simply working to pay your bills and that it sucks. Here we go....

1. Stop your line of thinking and go get 4-5 envelopes.

2. Pin down the exact amount of money you have left, and err on the side of caution, meaning you underestimate by about $10 or so.

3. Go to the ATM and pull all of this money out. CHANGE IT INTO SMALLER BILLS ($10's and $5's are ideal).

4. Label the envelopes according to your NEEDS - gas, food, medical/personal products, and FUN/OTHER. Personally, I keep an envelope for cigarettes as well. Break it up by what you consider your essentials. Make sure you keep an envelope for FUN. I don't care if you only have $5 to put in it, you need one or this will not work.

5.Start dividing the money in a realistic manner into the envelopes, based on how much you have and what you plan to use on each. Example: I have $200 for the next 2 weeks. This is what my envelopes would look like:
-gas: $40
-food(which means groceries): $80
-medical/personal:$20
-cigarettes: $20
-fun: $60
**side note: going out to eat comes from the fun envelope**

6. Pull the money from the correct envelope for what you will buy THAT DAY and no more. If you know you are going grocery shopping that day and getting gas, pull out $60 (40 for the groceries & 20 for the gas) - you have now spent that week's money, but you have some gas and you have something to eat. If you don't spend it all, put it back in the envelope it came from. If it's the day before you get paid again and you still have some money in that envelope, spend 1/2 of it on FUN, and put 1/2 of it in a savings account.

7. Empty and replenish your wallet every day - from the correct envelope, with the correct budgeted amount. Put any remainders back at the end of the day.

8. If you have a surplus in one area, move it around. If after a few weeks of doing this, I find that $80 is too much groceries for me for 2 weeks, I might put a little more into cigarettes or medical/personal, if I wanted some nice conditioner or something like that. This propels you to really think about your purchases and start making some sacrifices like driving less, buying cheaper products, using coupons, etc. You will learn what you value and where you can comfortably skimp. I will buy the store-brand contact solution and bar soap every day of the week if it means I can go see a movie on Friday and not have to put it on plastic.

9. When you are at the point where you can pay all bills on time and at least one of them ahead of time, try going without the envelopes. By this point, you've learned a lot about your spending habits, budgeting and some self-discipline. You've built a little cushion, so try to see if you can fly on your own. You can always go back to the envelopes if and when you need them.

Well, there you have it, mes amis. A way to dig yourself out of the hole while not feeling completely deprived. I wish I could take credit for all of this, but someone showed this to me long ago, and while I have put my own twists on it, it was passed on to me as I am passing it onto you. It's simple and it works. If you try this, I would love to hear how you do with it.

After all, I love you enough to tell you the truth, right?

Next post will be clothing-related. For now, save those pennies so you can be a responsible consumer.

Lots of thick, tough love, K

Take 2

I promised I'd go back to writing this blog. I asked you to hold me accountable. You did. I pondered, considered recanting, decided against that, and here we are. I am officially back, but different. When I began this blog, I was in a very different head space. If you know me, you know 2008 was both unkind and kind to me, and I learned a lot of lessons. Part of me saw this blog as me right before the hard knock hit, and I really wanted to just leave it behind for good, out of fear, out of regret, out of bitterness. But I can't do that. I love to write, and you know I love you, so what good would it do any of us?

So I have run back to you, wiser and a bit more cautious. I've also decided to add a new twist. As this is about both clothing and affording, I'm going to write on both. One post about a good find, another post about money - budgeting, credit, making it work, etc. Both will be an honest take and as always, straight from my heart. I hope you enjoy it.

Thank you for sticking by me, encouraging me, supporting me. It sends sunshine into my heart, and hopefully back to yours.

Next post - The envelope method (aka, what to do when you need to make it work in a tough financial spot).

Lots and lots of reunited love, K